“How Can Our Church Help The Ill?” is Good Question
Many of those with illness feel like they’ve never been asked, “How can our church help you?”
Regardless of what you may believe, it is a widely accepted assumption that when it comes to having a chronic illness having a church help out with things like meals, housework, or yard care is one of the benefits of this community. Many of those who live with an invisible illness, however, find it rare for a church to help, especially in the practical matters.
As a Christian, I am sad to admit that as churches have grown larger, I see most people with invisible illnesses falling through the cracks. Where we used to send out a pastor, deacon, or other leader in the church to find out the practical needs of the one who is ill–as well as spiritual concerns–we now flippantly say, “Oh, I will pray about that for you.”
Instead of saying, “Would you like some company while you wait for the test results?” We say, “I will pray the results are good.”
Instead of saying, “Would you like me to bring over some meals?” We say, “I will pray you are able to afford some help.”
We used to give ourselves, our time, our efforts. Now instead of offering prayer as a gift, we can use prayer as an excuse.
Oh, I prayed about that for her. I am sure something will work out. And prayer is the best gift I can give, right?” (wink)
When members of a church help out one who is suffering with emotional and physical pain, it is a wonderful gift. If you have a friend with a chronic illness, and you attend a church, take a minute to ask, “How can our church help you through this? What do you feel is lacking in our understanding? Outreach? Availability and accessibility of events for those with invisible illnesses?”
She will appreciate it.
TWEET THIS: Things TO SAY to an ill person #13 How can our church encourage those with chronic illness? #iiwk12
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-ljc
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I think I’ve been guilty of “keeping people in my prayers” rather than doing anything concrete. It’s very thought provoking.
Exactly… Instead of “Hands-On” HELP, Prayer is used as an excuse NOT TO. That verse “Faith with-out works is dead” is going to bite alot of holy-rollers in the bum. No one does anything to help anybody, it’s called HYPOCRISY. This sinner will do better than some “thumpers”. AMEN.
I understand exactly what you mean from personal experience with “good” Christians.
Wow Lisa I don’t know what Christians have done to offend you but there is no need for that attitude.
I have vol. for the Qld conservation council, aged care facilities etc etc… I am only pointing this out as I have been , in my view, lumped as a “basher”. I suggest as I did initially we just stick to talking about our own behaviours instead of knocking others and theirs beliefs.
I visit a church that is very kind to me, but somehow they don’t seem to realize that they have talked so much about helping others til they really are just fooling themselves. I am very much saddened by the apparent blindness. It seems like so many are poor themselves, that the fear of becoming worse themselves causes them to retreat to prayer.
Lisa, it sounds like you’ve been hurt by some people who are Christians and I’m sorry. Most of us have been hurt by others, Christian or not, even when they think they are well-intentioned. Sometimes it’s by things they’ve said, things they’ve done and things they’ve not done–opportunities to help that they have seemingly ignored. I’m blessed to say that I’ve also received generous help from others–most of that has been from Christians, but not all. There are good people everywhere–I hope that you’re able to expand your circle and find some people who are truly loving and who will find it an honor to help you. I will say that sometimes I’ve had to speak up and be an advocate for myself and come out and say what I need some help w/–both to people I know and also hen trying to locate help from organizations (strangers.) It’s hard to ask for and receive help when I used to be one who could generously give, back when I could work, had plenty of energy and plenty of money.
I concur with Lisa: do something to help rather than just pray and pat yourselves on the back for being such good Christians, and do it WITHOUT passing judgement on the person and without ramming your religion down his/her throat. Folks here might believe Lisa and I are exceptions, but you are wrong. There are thousands of people who see Christianity as pretty words around a hateful core because of the way the church has treated us personally over 5+ decades. Wanna change that? Get up and help because it’s the compassionate thing to do.
See comment at top of page.
Most of the churches I have been around want your cash contributions. They all tell you they care about the poor and the sick, but if you check them out its the money. I worked at a place that fed lunches, etc, but it was too sickening for me. After you see the cook add a pound of salt to a pan of food to kill any bacteria or mold and then one day you don’t see Mr. Jones, you ask where he is. Having qaudruple bypass. yeh! No wonder with all that salt in that free meal.
Whereas I have been volunteering 8 hours per week for the past 8 years at a secular non-profit foodbank which produces heart-healthy meals okayed by a nutritionist.
Churches run the gamut of humanity. In southwest Arkansas about 3years ago a minister was sentenced to 175 years in prison. For one thing he had married two girls when they were 9years old. His followers will let you know very quickly how caring he is and how awful you are. Some Christians pray and some Christians prey.
And some are not “Christians as they call themselves” at all.They just use the name of Christ like someone said to “prey” on the weak.They try to trash the name Christian .That’s why Jesus warns us about these people and their deceptions .And He says how many will stand before Him and and say ” Lord,Lord we did this and that (my paraphrase ) all in your name”. And Jesus will say “Leave me I NEVER knew you”. This man that did these things to those children I believe is a liar and Jesus will say I never knew you.Then onto where a person with that kind of heart goes. Someone that truly has the surrendered heart to God has the desire to help people.Sadly the “by name only” we have all met. I have.I hope anyone reading this needs will be met…take care ,from Florida
‘I’ll be thinking about you’ doesn’t cut it when I am trying to look after three people and be deal with my sickness, and try to run a part time business, and keep up with housework, and then I am so tired that I cannot even think about the possibility of a social life.
A person in the church was sick and their wife was also in the hospital, and I was one of about three people who took the time to fix them a meal and take it to them – and many of the other members have no illness at all!
No one asks how I’m doing, but they always ask about the elderly relatives that I am care giving. (This makes me feel quite valued)
Like Teresa of Avila said, ‘the only hands God has are your hands.’
Some of the most thoughtful people were not even in the church – very sad.
A good samaritan IS A DOER AND NOT A TALKER. I always think of this. I too a christian. But I just hate christian wealthy people who are just talking about, let’s pray for you, let’s pray for you. We all know that there is something in PRAYER. But then, if we are just here to talk and not do our obligations to help, it IS SO USELESS. I am also poor but trying to spread the love of GOD, through works and not by just saying my words and what we called “prayer prayer with matching Echoes.
Here is my video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ln7dI8ExLpw , sample of my good works.
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