Video: What NOT to say to an ill person
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If you have an invisible illness you have likely heard people say, “well, you look fine” or “you just have too much stress.” I have put together a video featuring a sampling of some of these things we hear. I couldn’t believe how easy it was to write the script, because I just started scribbling down all of the things I have heard over the past twenty years of living with degenerative rheumatoid arthritis.
I didn’t make this video to make people who are trying to be helpful feel badly and I didn’t do it to make those of us who are ill to feel angry with them.
Rather, let’s use this as a learning opportunity. Those of us who are ill can watch this and know that when people say these kinds of things to us it is so common that there is a video with those comments! It’s not personal–it’s just typical.
And for our friends or loved ones we may share it with, it’s a chance for them to possibly hear their own voice and be aware that words really can hurt.
If you like it, please share it! And we also have 20 tweets on this very topic you can share as well. Thanks, friends.
View all posts in this series
- Tweets! 20 Things to Say to an Ill Person
- How to Be a Fabulous Friend to Those with Illness
- How To Really Help Me When I Ask For Your Help
- “I Care About You” Important For Ill Friend To Hear
- Ask Ill Friend “I am Running An Errand. What Do You Need?”
- “Need to Vent?” Asks Understanding Friends of Those Who Are Ill
- “It’s Okay to Cry” Are Precious Words To Ill Friend
- “Beyond Casseroles” Provides Great Tools For Those Reaching Out to Hurting
- Tell a Chronically Ill Friend, “I Admire You”
- Bring a Meal to a Friend Who Is Ill – Not As Common As You Think
- An Ill Mom Appreciates Playdates For Her Kids
- How to Help a Friend Who Is Ill With Household Chores
- Prayer For A Friend With Illness Can Be Beneficial
- “I Will Listen” Is A Special Gift For Friend With Illness
- What to Know Before Telling An Ill Friend to Cheer Up!
- “How Can Our Church Help The Ill?” is Good Question
- Tell Me, What’s It Like To Be You For a Day?
- How To Bring Food To An Ill Friend Who May Be Embarrassed
- Ask Ill Friend How They’ve Come To Appreciate Life
- Wait With An Ill Friend While He Gets Test Results
- How to Help a Friend Who Has An Invisible Illness
- Ill Friends Know How To Listen, Not Just Say “Feel Better”
- Help An Ill Friend Get Stuff Done
- Is An Ill Friend Spiritual? Say, “Tell Me About God.”
- Video: What NOT to say to an ill person
- Ill Friends Can Teach One a Lot About Endurance
- When a Friend is Ill, The Right Words Are a Blessing