WEDNESDAY’S 9/15 SEMINAR: [1] Getting Organized [2] Parenting

Day #3 of Invisible Illness Week is tomorrow, so be sure to listen September 15 at 10:30 – 12 Pacific time; 12:30-2 PM Central time; or 1:30 PM – 3 PM Eastern time – USA time at http://invisibleillnessconference.com .

Here are 2 area many of us with illness struggle with – getting organized and parenting! Today’s first half of the program we will be joined by organizing and time management professionals who have both dealt with illness in their own households, so these are not empty suggestions. They may say, “make your bed” but they also know sometimes the energy is better spend doing something else (like eating).

Second half, we are excited to have Jill Hart from Christian Work at Home Moms, and “RA Warrior” who has 5 children! And Christine, the “Spoonie” Gal who is now a mom will be joining us to share her tips too.

Karen Whiting, a freelance writer and author of ten Secrets of Success for Women: Time. Her more than 400 articles and devotions have been published in over four-dozen magazines including Brio magazine, Focus on the Family, Today’s Christian Women, Reminisce, and Devo-Zine. Twitter: @KarenHWhiting

Marcia Ramsland, entertaining media guest expert, speaker, and professional organizer, is well known as “The Organizing Pro” for her practical tips and clever solutions in homes and offices. She appears non national radio and TV, and her tips in national magazines like Better Homes and Gardens, Woman’s Day, and Real Simple magazines. Marcia is the author of the popular “Simplify for Success” book series, Simplify Your Life, Simplify Your Time, Simplify Your Space, Simplify Your Holidays Ages and Stages of Getting Children Organized and booklet. Marcia has a daughter that got Fibromyalgia at age 17 and knows well what it’s like to have an invisible illness in the home. Twitter: @OrganizingPro

Jill Hart is the founder of Christian Work at Home Moms and the author of co-author of So You Want To Be a Work-At-Home Mom. She graduated from Grace University with a Bachelor’s Degree in Human Development/Family Studies and Bible. Jill has worked from home since 2000 and started her own home-based business to assist other Christians who desire to work from home while maintaining a godly life. Jill and her husband, Allen of CWAHD.com (Christian Work at Home Dads) reside in Nebraska with their two children. Jill also lives with a chronic illness. Twitter: @cwahm

Kelly Young is the mother five of children, two of whom are severely hearing impaired. She has homeschooled for 17 years, led parenting classes, taught many Bible studies and Adult Sunday School classes, and mentored others. Kelly has lived with autoimmune diseases most of her life and has several diagnoses, including RA. She is author of the website Rheumatoid Arthritis Warrior and the moderator of an uplifting Facebook group with about 5,300 members. Kelly encourages others to fight their disease and trust God for help and hope. Kelly lives on Florida’s Space Coast and is an avid fan of Church liturgy, NASA, and NFL football. Twitter: @RAWarrior

Christine Miserandino is a writer, speaker, patient advocate, wife and mother living in Massapequa Park, NY. Christine is the founder of www.butyoudontlooksick.com, a website that provides resources and useful tips for living life to the fullest with a chronic illness. Her writing which has won various awards has been featured in numerous newspapers, magazines, medical newsletters and television media. She has been living with lupus for over 15 years, and has been volunteering for the Lupus Alliance, Long Island/ Queens Affiliate for 12 years. Twitter: @bydls

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Tuesday’s Workshop Panelists Share About Relationships and Chronic Illness

Our seminar today was “Relationships When You Live with a Chronic Illness” and Cheryl Ricker and Pam Farrel joined Lisa Copen to discuss friendship and marriage as they relate to chronic illness. Unfortunately Allison Bottke had an emergency and could not make it.

Lisa opened up by confessing that she was still in her PJs and had not had time to get dressed before the program. (So if you are listening in PJs, you are in good company!)

Cheryl discussed helping a friend with chronic illness and they shared what was done for them that has helped them as they cope with chronic illness. Cheryl shared the story behind her book, Friend in a Storm, of poetry written for a friend going through cancer treatment and how the gift of words is a wonderful gift.

Pam joined Lisa halfway through the program and they discussed the marriage relationship when one person is coping with chronic illness. She explained just what the difference is between men and women and what it is that makes them tick. Lisa asked Pam about the emotions involved when a spouse tells a chronically ill person, “I miss who you used to be…” Pam also shared some other tips from her book The Marriage Code.

You can still listen this program any time as it is archived. Either go to www.invisbleillnessconference.com or click in the BlogTalkRadio blue box to the right of this post.

“I loved the part on marriage and what Pam shared about how to communicate with your spouse when something slips out of your mouth that you should not have said,” shares Kelsey. “Thank you for these wonderful podcasts that I can listen to from my home!”

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If Just One Person… Believes in You

In honor of all of you who have been leaving sticky notes in anonymous little places where someone can find them and be encouraged, we dedicate this song to you.

Thank you for letting someone find a note that let’s them know someone believes in them.

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How Do You Start Becoming a “Well” Ill Person?

By Sue Ingebretson

Embarking on a journey can be both frightening and exciting. When the journey is about health — your own health — you may feel that the frightening far outweighs the exciting.

If you’re someone who’s chronically ill, consider your current status:

• Are you where you want to be?
• Do you feel satisfied with your level of wellness?

Few would answer “yes” to that question. Understanding the health journey process goes a long way toward removing the “frightening factor,” and that’s where the following illustration helps.

When I describe what I call the Rebuilding Wellness concept at speaking engagements, I tell it this way. Think about fixing up a home. Maybe it appears rundown; the eves sag, the paint has peeled, and the once-green lawn has gone beige. Nothing that some operating sprinklers and a new coat of paint can’t fix.

But, if you put some thought into it before the elbow grease, a home that has visible problems might have others, too. It could have problems that aren’t visible, bigger ones beneath the warped siding. What if the roof leaks or the plumbing is bad. Even worse, what if the foundation has cracks – serious cracks. Would slapping on a coat of exterior paint suffice as the ultimate remedy then?

Our health issues are the same way. By the time symptoms appear on the surface, the problems that caused them have already run amok elsewhere. Chronic illness takes time to manifest. It stands to reason that the application of solutions will be no quick fix.

So, where to begin? Consider the type of “cracks” that are affecting your foundation: nutritional deficiencies, extreme stress, toxin exposure (internal and external), infections, injuries, and/or hormonal/thyroid dysfunction. Take a look at what you think affects you most. Begin an action plan to remedy these problems and fortify your “home.”

Tackling these “cracks” one at a time is a big job, but I promise, Rebuilding Wellness is always a worthwhile investment.

Susan Ingebretson is a writer, speaker and the director of program development for the Fibromyalgia Research and Education Center at California State University, Fullerton. Her book, FibroWHYalgia, (2010) details her own journey from illness to wellness. You can read more at her website, Rebuilding Wellness. Ingebretson’s writing has appeared in the National Fibromyalgia Association (NFA) online and print magazine, FibromyalgiaAWARE. Susan is also featured in the NFA’s Public Service Announcement, “The Science Behind Fibromyalgia.”

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Discovering A New Normal

By Keri Delphia

With Invisible Illness Week right around the corner it has had me thinking what my life is like living with an invisible illness. For me it has been trying to say the least.

I, like so many others who I have talked to, was a perfectly healthy, full-of-energy, lots-of-stamina, wife, mother, and business woman– until one day all of that changed.

When I say “one day” it seemed as though one day I was fine the next my whole world was changed. Not only did it change my life, but it changed my whole family’s life. The wife and mother they knew who coudl– and would–do anything they needed, was now too tired, in too much pain, or mentally couldn’t remember small details that were so important to them.

Here we are six years later and I sit here trying to make this make sense with as few words as I can I can say: I have the utmost certainty that God’s Grace, Mercy and Love, has walked our family through this Journey. It has not been easy. Lot’s of doctors’ appointment, lots of disappointment in trying to find answers. And trying to learn a new normal in our lives.

I think the hardest thing for me was admitting there was something wrong with me and listening to my body; Not worrying about what people were thinking about me.

When you look normal on the outside, meaning you show no outward signs of being sick, you know that people have a hard time understanding or having sympathy to your illness. This is something that I know first hand. I was one of those people.

That I know is one of the things that God wanted me to learn through my own illness.

My family has learned a new normal. We all understand that it may have to be adjusted day by day, but communication and honesty about how I feel is a huge key it keeping a peace around our house! No matter what God is with me always and with Him I can do all things! Maybe not the way I used to, but by His grace I find a new way!

Keri Delphia is a very social person who loves to be around people. She began her career as a hairstylist in 1987 and was passionate about it until she was no longer able to do it in 2007. Now she manages a hair salon part time and enjoys sharing her knowledge with the stylists that are just starting their careers. She has been married for 16 years and has two boys 19 and 9! They are a true joy in her life! She also has 12 chickens and 1 Rooster–quite a hoot and she loves the fresh eggs. She lives with Thalamic Pain Syndrome and has been suffering for 5 years now, but it has just been recently that she was diagnosed. Visit her blog, Pain Free Journey for more writings such as this.

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TUESDAY’S 9/14 SEMINAR: Relationships, Friendships, Kids, Parents, Marriage

We’re back for day #2 of Invisible Illness Week, so join us September 14 at 10:30 – 12 Pacific time; 12:30-2 PM Central time; or 1:30 PM – 3 PM Eastern time – USA time at http://invisibleillnessconference.com .

Relationships are one of the biggest struggles we run into when trying to do our best to cope with daily chronic pain–that no one can actually see, and that we cannot “prove.” Join this amazing group of women who talk about marriage, friends, parents and how to set effective boundaries, as well as keep those relationships (especially our marriage) full of joy without getting jaded.

Allison Bottke is the woman behind God Allows U-Turns and now Setting Boundaries. Do you have an adult child who is breaking your heart? An aging parent taking up your whole life? A problem with food? Allison’s resources can help you discover SANITY and take back your life. Between books and support groups around the country, Allison is one who has “been there” and knows it’s hard to set boundaries, but necessary for your own sanity! Twitter @AllisonBottke

Pam Farrel is a relationship specialist, international speaker, and author of over 30 books including best-selling Men are like Waffles, Women are like Spaghetti which she wrote with her husband, Bill. Bill and Pam are frequent guests on radio and television including Focus on the Family, where their interviews with Dr. Dobson were ranked Top 10. She is the founder and President of Seasoned Sisters, a ministry to women 40-65. Twitter: @PamFarrel

Cheryl Ricker is the author of the new book, Friend in the Storm, which is a collection of poems she wrote to a friend who was coping with cancer. She shares about her childhood, “I thought everybody was staring at me through big critical eyes. My self-consciousness affected my confidence which affected my relationships. Insecurity was my gift that kept on giving. So what did I do? I wrote poetry to process the pain of childhood rejection. It was as if some part of my restless brain knew the power of poetry to reach the broken places.” Twitter: @CherylRicker

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Monday’s Workshop Talks About New Normal, Stages of Emotions When Coping with Illness

Georgia Shaffer, Maureen Pratt, and Mary Yerkes joined Lisa for our opening seminar for Invisible Illness Week, “Living with Chronic Illness: Why It Hurts, How to Cope.”

They shared about grieving our losses as we’re coping with chronic illness: accepting our illnesses, restructuring our life, and redefining our “new normal.”

You can still listen this program any time as it is archived. Either go to www.invisbleillnessconference.com or click in the BlogTalkRadio blue box to the right of this post.

During the 90-minute show they discuss the various emotions we deal with and what to do with them. They discussed the best effective coping mechanisms and suggestions for what to do when we’re overwhelmed.

They had time for a couple of callers who asked the panelists about certain coping tips. Elizabeth W. listened and says, “It was a GREAT seminar! I learned a lot. I will likely listen to it over to get all the tips down – I can’t write with my illness and can’t remember all that well – but it touched me deeply and honestly and hit me where I live!”

We’re so glad you enjoyed it! Be sure tune in tomorrow as we talk about relationships.

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Finding My Voice — To Sing Despite Chronic Illness & Pain

This may seem like a non sequitur, but I think people who can sing are really cool. My best friend is a singer, and when she cuts loose the sound is so beautiful it sometimes brings tears to my eyes-not just because she hits the right notes, but because she seems so natural, so comfortable, so confident.

When I think of the people who inspire me most, most are singers: Björk, Natalie Maines, Madonna, India Irie, Lady Gaga, Natasha Bedingfield… I could go on and on. It’s not just the gorgeousness of their voices or their awesome vocal technique; often, it’s about their message, and how I feel it through the music. They’re so, well, free. And powerful!

So I decided to take a singing class. I talked about it for a while, and I procrastinated because I’m nervous about performing in front of people. I kept singing in the shower, listening with a way-too-critical ear. Then one night, two people I’m quite close to surrounded me, shoved a class schedule from a local school in my hand, and basically forced me to sign up. That’s my story, anyway.

The first class was the other night, and I was really nervous. Turns out, some other students were WAY more nervous than I. Watching each person perform a few notes was fascinating; some people were clearly freaked out and giggled nervously, but others sang with confidence and ease. One woman sang when she wasn’t supposed to, and her voice was beautiful; she got embarrassed about missing her cue, but I thought she was fantastic.

Which brings me (in a roundabout way, I know) to you, Babes. We sick folk often lose our voices. We get shy, afraid to sing out in a crowd and let our opinion be heard. We get embarrassed, feeling like people hear us complain all the time…so why should we keep making noise? We feel something deep within but we get bogged down in how we think other people view us, and we’re afraid to speak up. We’re afraid to sing.

But just like that woman in class the other night-the one who sang out of step with the group but sounded marvelous-we have to get over our fear of staying in line with everyone else and learn to just BELT IT OUT! What we have to say is meaningful, valuable and beautiful. And while we may feel rusty at first, I know that with a little practice we can sing a tune that moves others to action.

Maybe you just use your voice on your own behalf, make a plea for help that is finally heard because you articulate your needs (symptoms? frustrations?) clearly and authoritatively. Maybe your voice soars over the crowd, reaching hundreds or thousands through a blog in which you tell your story and show others how to be strong.

Maybe your voice inspires your family and friends to learn more about your illness, or advocate for you or others. Maybe your voice will be so beautiful and strong that you reach another ChronicBabe who feels alone, who needs to be inspired to find her inner strength so she can start to feel better. Maybe you can change her life.

Once you start singing, who knows what could happen? I used to be afraid to speak up and use my voice to advocate for my own needs; the idea of speaking out on behalf of others, in the face of disbelievers or critics, seemed crazy. And look where I wound up, Babes?! On TV, in newspapers and magazines, on the radio and here on the internets, raising a ruckus on behalf of ChronicBabes everywhere. You can do it, too! Even if it’s just for your own sake, sing out. Make your presence known. I can’t wait to hear your voices!

Until then, I’ll keep singing in the shower. And in the classroom. And walking down the sidewalk. And to anyone who will listen.

Jenni Prokopy is founder and ChronicBabe.com, an online resource for young women with chronic illness. An award-winning writer, speaker, and expert on healthy living, she shares her personal experience – and rallies the expertise of hundreds of others – to help women live beyond their illness and be total Babes. Her writing has appeared in numerous publications, and she has worked with dozens of organizations large and small, local and multinational, to create compelling messages that empower people to work better, play harder. . .and be their best.

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“Bring On The Rain” Video is Comforting

Vicki Sodora of Palm Beach Gardens, FL shares the video with us below.

“Having an illness that effects every aspect of your life, relationships and how you view the world has been an eye-opening experience for me personally. After meeting with other people who went through similar trials, my heart broke. I know that some people just need to be HEARD. (REALLY HEARD!) I created this video – as an affirmation and an encouragement for others. I know that through trials, God has a plan to use them for good and that is hope to hold onto – through the pain. ”

(By clicking on the video it will take you to the location on YouTube whre the video resides so you can listen.)

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MONDAY’S 9/13 SEMINAR: Why Illness Hurts, How to Cope

We kick things off at September 13 at 10:30 – 12 Pacific time; 12:30-2 PM Central time; or 1:30 PM – 3 PM Eastern time – USA time at http://invisibleillnessconference.com . Remember, if you miss it… it’s okay! It will be archived for eons!

Have you wondered why the emotional part of coping with a chronic illness can sometimes be more draining than the physical symptoms? Do you not know where to turn to get past hurt feelings or feeling like no one understands? We’e put together a 90-minute time today with three women who we believe can help you find the answers to these questions.

Georgia Shaffer is a licensed psychologist in Pennsylvania and a certified life coach. For over 15 years, she has enhanced people’s lives by teaching how to identify: “What needs to grow? What needs to go?” She is also is on the teaching staff of the Christian Leaders, Authors & Speakers Seminar (CLASS) and Personality Plus. She has great insight into why we do what we do, which she has shared in her books and will be sharing with us! Twitter: @GeorgiaShaffer

Author and speaker Maureen Pratt lives with multiple illnesses, including organ-involved lupus, cardiovascular disease, osteoarthritis, hypothyroidism, and chronic back pain. Through her books, including “Peace in the Storm: Meditations on Chronic Pain & Illness,” articles, and talks, she encourages others to deepen their faith and Christian walk in spite of and with living with chronic illness. Twitter: @MaureenPratt

Mary Yerkes is a professional life coach who specializes in working with the chronically ill. Diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis and other autoimmune diseases in 1997, Mary combines years of practical experience with her professional training to help the chronically ill build meaningful and significant lives, of which illness is only a part. She is also an author and speaker. To learn more about Coach Mary and the services she offers, visit www.newlifechristiancoaching.com. Twitter: @newlifeonline

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